No matter what it is, if you have recently gone through a hard time, you have to allow yourself time to recover. From losing a loved one, the break-up of a relationship, to being involved in a truck accident, life throws you hard times now and again, but the important thing is to pick yourself up again and carry on afterwards. You don’t have to do this straight away, of course, but when you are ready to, here are some ways you can pick yourself up and start to feel like you again.
Get into a Routine
When it feels like everything is falling apart around you and all you want to do is curl up in bed, you should allow yourself some time to grieve, wallow, rest and recover, but then to help yourself feel better, one of the best things you can do is to get yourself back into a routine. Having structure will make you feel happier; this could be as simple as a regular morning work out or eating meals at certain times. Having a structure makes it easier to get out of bed and if you can’t do much else, then just focus on the basics like eating, sleeping, exercise, and work. When you’re feeling better, you can incorporate more. For now, give yourself a break and just go back to basics.
Feel Proud of Yourself
Don’t spend your time thinking about the things you’re not doing; focus on what you are doing and feel proud of yourself. Remember, you’ve been through a tough time, you’re not supposed to be back to normal straight away, so focus on the good things (even if that’s hard). Be proud of the fact that you’re holding yourself together. Feel proud of your strength. Be proud if you made your bed today, had a shower or got dressed. You can even feel proud of the simple fact that you’re awake. Just pick one thing and focus on that. When negative thoughts come up, go right back to that positive thing you’ve already picked out. There is always a positive, even in dark times.
Stay in the Present
While this can be really difficult to do, if you want to feel better then try not to focus on the past or the future, just stay in the now. It can be too hard to think about what you’re going to do for the rest of your life, just focus on how you’re going to get through the next five minutes. Anything more and it could easily stress you out, be too overwhelming and leave you with negative thoughts which are not helpful. Dwelling on the past is just as bad as worrying about the future. You’ll tie yourself in knots thinking about what could have, should have or would have been.
Lean on Your Family and Friends
While your friends and family might be going through the same thing – for example, the death of a family member will affect them, then turn to your friends. There is always someone you can turn to, someone who has been through the same thing and someone who can and will be there for you. Let your family and friends support you, allow them to provide emotional support while you’re going through this tough time. You might not want to talk about it. So don’t. Just let friends and family know what you need, and they’re usually happy to help.
Remember that they might not know the exact right thing to do or say, so try to be as transparent as you can. Usually, their silence isn’t because they don’t want to talk to you, they’re just not sure of the right thing to say, or they’re going through something of their own.
Try New Things
You’re probably don’t actively want to do anything and certainly nothing new, well forget that and do it anyway. If you don’t know what to do, think about how you liked to spend your time when you were younger, what made you happy then? Was there someone you always wanted to do but never did? Try a new hobby, go out and meet new people, try a new activity or volunteer somewhere. If you add something new to your routine, and you’ll be amazed at how much this energy will help you to feel better.
Just remember that how you are feeling right now, is not how you’re going to feel forever. Things will get easier, and there are happier times ahead.